Kelsey goes to her sister's house, and her sister is AGOG AND AGHAST that Kelsey is covered in ranch dust. I guess I see where Kelsey got her stupidity, it runs in the family.
When Dani asks Kelsey where Brady is, she gives some non-committal answer while her internal monologue waxes about how she's afraid of what she'd do if she's alone with Brady for the night again and that she's afraid he'd reject her.
Here's a thought, maybe these two should sit down and have a nice, constructive conversation about what they really want?
Of course not, this is a romance novel, and the #1 rule of Romcoms (movie and otherwise), is to make sure there's as big of a Misunderstanding as humanly possible! Screw being honest and upfront with each other! That's not the way to woo someone!
Beau tells Kelsey they'll help her in any way they can, and Kelsey tries not to be jealous of her sister's picture perfect lives in wedded bliss. And then asks for a spare laptop.
Kelsey then leaves with Dani's laptop. This scene is utterly pointless. She goes to someone named Jenna's apartment. I don't remember who Jenna is or if she was mentioned earlier, but I'm more flabbergasted that she lets herself inside and randomly starts stripping. Well now. Of course, it's to take a shower, but I have to wonder who Jenna is and if she's okay with with this Too Stupid to Live woman breaking into her house to take a shower.
On the masculine side of things, Brady too takes a shower. Parallels! After he's done washing away the nasty, he goes and tries to find Kelsey. Apparently he too knows who the hell Jenna is and finds Kelsey's truck there. When no one answers his knock, Brady takes a hint for Kelsey and just lets himself inside. Kelsey is wearing a sexy negligee because apparently there are no other clothes of Jenna's that would fit her.
Kelsey is PISSED, so the negligee wasn't for his benefit, I guess (not that she knew he was coming). She angrily tells Brady that she's there to work and DAMMIT IF SHE'S NOT GOING TO LOOK SEXY DOING IT. Sweetie, prostitutes wear negligees to work, not ranchers.
Brady grinned. She looked as ready to make love as he was to give it.Shut up Brady, you're a douche. But he does make the same observation I did, that she looks like a lady of the evening. He then "volunteers" for her work. And when Kelsey thinks he's joking, he's like 'LOL NOPE. I WANNA BE YOUR BOOTY CALL.' He's more hot and cold than effing Edward Cullen.
Kelsey ignores him and starts working and explaining what she has to schedule and all that crap. She tells him to go to the dance hall (DANCE HALL) and he asks why she's wearing a negligee. Of course, it's because Jenna only has this kind of nightwear in her closet. Way to make this sound totally and completely believable, Cathy Gillen Thatcher. If they do it on Jenna's couch I'm going to feel so sorry for the faceless woman.
"Well, you look...really nice...." Brady said at last, knowing that didn't begin to cover it. She looked sensational. He didn't know how he was going to get through the evening without making her his.
Um... by going home? Just sayin'.
In any case, Kelsey returns the compliment and says she has to get back to work. Brady offers to help (fnar-fnar). Kelsey says no, and Brady goes to raid Jenna's refrigerator. Okay, if I was this Jenna person, I'd be righteously pissed right now. What the hell? Kelsey has my reaction, and Brady explains that he's hungry. As if that makes it okay he's raiding someone else's refrigerator without permission. Brady bitches that there's nothing in the fridge but diet soda and yogurt. Poor baby, how dare Jenna not keep her fridge stocked with Mountain Dew, bacon, and ice cream just for your sorry ass?
Kelsey doesn't care, obviously, and tells Brady that he should go to a restaurant before going to the ranch. AKA, strongly hinting that he should leave. Oh Kelsey, you should know better that Brady is as dumb as a rock and therefore needs a rock to get a hint smashed into his thick noggin.
Brady is a creeper and watches her use a computer badly. Since this book was published in 2001 I can forgive her lack of ease in using a computer. He offers to bring her back food. Kelsey reiterates that she's okay with yogurt and diet soda. Brady stands there like a doof, and realizes Kelsey is freezing him out.
He FINALLY asks if he did something wrong.
Kelsey says no and then immediately has trouble with a graphics program. Brady decides that he's okay at computer and that he should help. Kelsey's laptop as frozen, and Brady unhelpfully suggests hitting the escape key.
CTRL+ALT +DEL bitches. Which is presumably what Brady does next, and the computer is still not working for them. HOW CONVENIENT. Also, damn, Kelsey effed up her sister's laptop. Not good times. Brady suggests that it's a hardware problem, and he's frustrated because the computer won't even turn off.
Try taking out the battery? Jeebus, I knew more about computers when it was actually 2001 than these jokers, and I was fifteen. Kelsey whines that Dani's going to kill her, and Brady tries to soothe her by telling her it's not her fault. I dunno, I think it is, the computer was just fine until Kelsey Numbnuts tried to work on it.
After some nonsense, Kelsey feels better because Dani has several computers as a film critic. Then Brady tells her to buy her own damn laptop to screw up. The best thing ever happens.
Abruptly, the computer screen went blank. Noticing, Kelsey said, "Hey, it shut off all by itself."
But it didn't turn on again.
Nor, to Brady's disappointment, did Kelsey.
BEST FREAKIN' LINE EVER.
Brady is then sad that Kelsey's going to bed at 8:30 (Kelsey suddenly turned into my mom). Kelsey ignores Brady's sexiness and says that she's very tired. Brady is disappoint.
Kelsey tells him to go home, but Brady decides diet coke and yogurt is for the week and offers to go get food.
Kelsey didn't like the possessive note in his low tone or the presumption in his eyes. That this was going to turn out to be some romance- or sex-filled evening after all. He had already turned her down twice. She wasn't giving him a chance to go all gallant on her and turn her down again. "I told you I'm not hungry."
I'd make some comment here but you all know what I'd say. So come up with your own OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD JUST MAKE UP YOUR DAMNED MINDS joke.
Brady promises to bring it back just in case. Then Kelsey has more internal monologue about the state of their relationship, repeating ad nauseum what has gone before. Instead of straight up telling Brady she wants some time alone, she just tells him that he's not sharing a bed with her. Brady promises to sleep on the sofa. Or, you know HE COULD JUST GO HOME.
Kelsey says that too, and for once I applaud her for not being stupid. Brady then brings up the point that Wade and everyone else will be worried the marriage is over after like, a day. And then they'd lose their ranch and all that bullshit. Sigh. Maybe I"m just not used to romance novels, but what the hell, is all of their plots ridiculously contrived and rehashed as padding and filler?
Brady then leaves and goes to get dinner. He goes to a pizza joint, because pizza rules. We hear some more nonsense about Mac, the wonder, and I don't care. Brady asks Mac how Kelsey likes her pizza.
Mac grinned the way everyone who knew they were newlyweds grinned. "Trying to surprise her with a honeymoon special, huh?"
I have no idea what that means, but I'm imagining this:
Brady lies and says that's it, not that he wants to lure Kelsey out to have hot lovin (though, I suppose in retrospect, that's exactly the same thing).
Brady orders a pizza (ew onions) and hot wings and an Italian sub. Brady then is a creeper and asks Mac if he's known Kelsey long. Mac dated her apparently, as has every man in town. Mac reiterates that she's fickle, but he hopes that Brady can settle her down. Like he honestly cares?
And maybe not, Brady thought, as he considered the way she was running hot and cold with him, recklessly inviting him into her bed one minute, kicking him out of it entirely the next.
YOU'RE ONE TO TALK, BRADY CULLEN.
Mac says that he dated Kelsey for two weeks, and explains they didn't break up, she just kind of flat out ignored him. Oh Kelsey, you're so Junior High. Of course, this freaks out Brady since she seems to be "losing interest" with him like she does with everyone else.
Meanwhile, Kelsey can't sleep because she's hungry and didn't eat any yogurt. She's pissy because she can smell the pizza. Since she's a tomboy, she decides to go out and eat. Because, as we know, only tomboys like to eat instead of brood!
Brady doesn't look at her breasts for once, and he says some snarky-ass thing about her having a quick sleep. They then have some back and forth dialogue about food and it's super irritating. She finds cream soda in the fridge. She's also too hopeless to make a shopping list to buy it when she's at the store and it's her favorite. I mean, seriously, what the hell? If it's you're favorite, you don't "forget" to buy it. I'm the person who forgets to buy what I actually go to the store for but you can bet your ass I still remember to grab my favorite salsa every time.
Kelsey is weirded out that Brady talked to Mac the entire time he was there. And Brady is a smug dick about it. They continue talking about how she dated Mac and she wasn't fickle, it just didn't work out. Correct me if I'm wrong, but why is everyone so obsessed with her love life? Brady I can understand since he's married to her and sometimes he wants to have a relationship with her, but everyone else in town? Do they not have other people's love lives to obsess over?
Of course, Kelsey is freaking out that Brady's criticizing her and honestly I don't give a flying squirrel about any of this conversation so I'm skipping ahead and skim. Kelsey says none of the guys she dated were Mr. Right so she ended it like a normal person would. Guys took it as a challenge and that's why they asked her out. Of course, it turns into some misogynistic game that OMG IF I DO KELSEY IT'S A QUEST OF MANLINESS. Do guys actually do this? I mean, seriously. If I get Kelsey Lockhart into bed, I'm a real man? Please.
Kelsey likes Brady because he wasn't like that. Of course, Brady is uncomfortable because he totally wants into her pants (probably even more so since she didn't let him in right away). Of course, he's dug in deeper when Kelsey's like "you haven't lied to me or using me wah wah wah."
Of course, he did lie to her, so muahahaha. Kelsey finishes eating and decides to go to bed alone. Still. Good lord. I'm so sick of these people hemming and hawing I just want them to do it so they'll shut up about it. Also, go to your own house, for crying out loud. People are going to be like "WTF why are they screwing around in someone else's apartment instead of their entire ranch?"
As she gets ready for bed, Kelsey muses that her first time has to be because of true love. Which, okay, that's cool, but I don't care about her feelings because she's irritating and stupid. She also convinces herself that he's only concerned for the business and he's just lusting after her, not falling for her. She thanks him for dinner, brings him a blanket at a pillow (GO HOME YOU SQUATTER), she tells him sweet dreams.
Brady takes the opportunity to give her a goodnight kiss. They say good night and I'm very disappointed in these two for staying in someone's apartment without permission.
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