Chapter Nine
We open the chapter with Brady vainly trying to tell himself that Kelsey wasn't cheating on him (They supposedly have no relationship other than marriage of convenience, right?).
But when he saw her run out of the house in a dress and high heels, looking pretty enough to pose for wedding pictures, he was no longer sure of anything.That's kind of a weird analogy CONSIDERING THEY GOT MARRIED IN DIRTY JEANS.
Brady immediately decides to follow her. Because that always works well. He awkwardly follows her in his truck to the Gilded Lily, and is pissy when he realizes that she is having a Secret Rendezvous (that's literally what it's called in the book). At this point I just want to facepalm at the sheer level of contrivance in this stupid book.
Brady whines to himself about how much this hurts. I'd actually CARE if A) I didn't know that Kelsey was going on a test date with the other dude and B) Brady wasn't such a raging asshole. He then continues to blame himself for not giving Kelsey what she wanted (SEX). When did she have time to cheat on him anyway? They like, have barely been married for three days and spent most of that together. Dear Lord.
The action (haha) then switches back to Kelsey on her fake date with Rafe. Rafe is super anxious and Kelsey tells him the chick he wants to date isn't going to mind if he eats with the wrong fork (like most people wouldn't).
"I think you should just be yourself," Kelsey soothed. Seeing how nervous Rafe still was, she reached over and took his hand in hers. "Honestly," she said, staring deep into his eyes with as much confidence-inspiring intensity as she could, "everything is going to be fine. You'll see."
You're welcome.
OF COURSE THE MOMENT IS RUINED BY BRADY STORMING IN HAHAHAH oh god shoot me.
She propped her hands on her hips and gave Brady a stern look. "And if you'll calm down, and sit down, Rafe and I will explain."
To Kelsey's chagrin, Brady's blue eyes turned even stormier. Up till now, Brady had always been so easygoing, even in the tensest situations. She hadn't figured he had a jealous bone in his body. That showed how much she knew!
ugh brady is asshole kelsey is stupid repeat ad nauseum.
Brady literally tries to manhandle her out of the restaurant, but Kelsey shakes him off. Brady gets pissy (well, more than he was already), and it's time for HIM to stare at HER. Ugh. He asks her if she doesn't see anything wrong with dating Rafe while married to him. Kelsey says she doesn't. Rafe, the poor schmuck, tells Brady to listen to Kelsey. RUN AWAY RAFE. YOU STILL HAVE A CHANCE WITH YOUR LACK OF CHARACTERIZATION.
Rafe continues that everything is perfectly innocent and Brady wants to punch something (Rafe, why didn't you take my advice?).
"If you think that, you're as messed up as she is...." Brady swore at Rafe in a low, furious voice (C: Hasn't this plot device been used in 3/4ths of the romantic comedies every filmed?).
The maitre d' hovered behind them, like the referee in a boxing ring. "Please, folks. No scenes."
Brady turned around grimly (C: YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO USE ADVERBS ANYMORE WOMAN). "Don't worry. There isn't going to be one," he told the maitre d'. "I've seen all I need to see." Ignoring Kelsey altogether, he turned on his heel and walked out of the restaurant.As soon as I knew where this plot was going I wanted to punch something just as much as Brady. What the hell, seriously? Come up with a different source of tension. I hate this plot so much. It's a waste of words and the flat characters really don't make it fresh or interesting or even actually tense. It's just another eye rolling induced headache.
Rafe tells Kelsey to go after him, but she instead sits down, embarrassed. She's understandably upset that Brady jumped to conclusions about what happened (it's not like they were even kissing or anything). She ties his assumptions to her sisters' assumptions (sisters suck in this universe). Brady had defied that stereotyped until omg tonight.
You know, if Kelsey HADN'T gone on a random, no-one-ever-does-that-shit date with Rafe, NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED. Of course, Brady would have still been an asshole and he certainly shouldn't have treated her that way, but Kelsey is a gigantic lunatic and I hate her.
These two people deserve each other.
He was either going to have to clean up his act and go back to trusting her again or go back to wherever it was he had come from. And she was going to tell him that as soon as she caught up with him again.Go to hell, Kelsey. This would be more noble if you weren't such a birdbrain and if Brady hadn't been an asshole from day 1.
She decides to continue her date with Rafe. The date is nice, but omg he forgot to ask if she wanted to dessert. Side story, I've never, on any date that I can remember, had a guy ask me if I wanted dessert. Usually because I either could bake anything we wanted ooooor just go to the bakery to get it. Ah the perks of owning a bakery!
Anyway, Rafe also steps on her toes a couple times while they were dancing. He gains confidence from this little fake date, d'awwww.
Kelsey drives back to the ranch, nervous about encountering Brady again. When she gets back to the ranch, she can't find Brady anywhere, even though his truck is there. Around midnight he hears someone approach on horseback and finds that it's Brady being all broody.
After some time passes, Kelsey goes to the stables and finds Brady's little private quarters. Brady's in the shower.
He was currently in the shower. He had obviously stripped off his clothes the moment he walked in-they were hanging over the sides of the stall (c: don't you usually strip off clothes when you're going straight to the shower?). Kelsey thought about backing out of the room, then decided against it.
BECAUSE THEY'RE MARRIED AND SHE'S SEEN HIM NAKED. Oh god just do it. Please, just do it FINALLY so you can put me out of my misery.
So Kelsey becomes a creepy ass creeper and watches him shower. All she can see is the bottom of his legs and her head and shoulders. Brady, though, hears her come in so he turns and glares at him. I forgot to point out that Brady installed a shower in the stables, like they have in high schools, so that's why he's randomly showering there.
He rinses and turns the water off. Kelsey's standing there like a weirdo when Brady comes out wearing only a towel. He asks what she wants, and Kelsey says to talk to him.
When Brady asks if her boyfriend is there, she gets all indignant and again says how much she hates it when people assume crap about her without taking time to understand. Broken record, yadda yadda yadda. Kelsey finally tries to tell her side of the story, explaining that she was doing Rafe a favor, but Brady's a dickwad (though kind of understandably, but he's still a dickwad in his presentation) and doesn't want to hear about it. He obviously doesn't believe that her date with Rafe was pretend.
So Kelsey launches into the explanation of the stupidity of the fake date and why Rafe came to her for help.
Brady then says that she stayed at the restaurant with Rafe instead of going home with Brady. OH WHY WOULD SHE DO THAT WHEN YOU TREATED HER LIKE COMPLETE SHIT BRADY TELL ME THAT.
This book isn't good for my blood pressure.
Oh goodness, I flipped ahead a few pages to see how much longer this chapter is and there is definite married people shenanigans!
Okay, back to the topic at hand. Kelsey starts pacing the room and continues explaining why she helped Rafe. Brady's pissy because he's her husband, not that, you know, either of them could sit down for two seconds and actually established if they wanted a real marriage or not.
Kelsey reiterates that it's a marriage in name only, and THANK GOD she calls him out on acting possessive, but ruins it by saying, "It's not as if we're really man and wife." Which, you know, makes sense in terms of the fake date, but it's like, wtf, Brady's irrational behavior would be okay if they were married and he was pulling all this crap, telling her what to do and what's best for her and keeping secrets? I'm going that she's only thinking of the former, because otherwise I want to cry.
Brady finally says they should be man and wife for serious. FINALLY. FINALLY SOMEONE SAYING WHAT THEY WANT GOD.
He kisses her, and she moans immediately. Then we get a gross description of TONGUE KISSING and then...
He encircled her with his heat and strength until Kelsey's whole body was alive, quivering with urgent sensations unlike any she had ever felt.
Hot damn! Get Brady to the hospital stat, I think we have a new resuscitation device!
Brady's hands get a-wanderin', and Kelsey's digging the whole thing. Also, what is with people using the term "melt" when describing someone letting their body relax? It's kind of weird. Because mainly I get this image:
Kelsey can feel Brady's manroot AND his heart pounding. She's quite a multitasker, at least in terms of sensations. Brady finally admits that he wants her, and he kisses her all over her face and throat.You're welcome.
AND HALLELUJAH THIS HAPPENS.
Lifting his head from hers, he asked in a low voice that seemed wrenched from his very heart, "What do you want?"A little purple but THANK YOU Brady, Thank you for finally, FINALLY asking Kelsey what she wants! It's ridiculous this happened on page 176, but at least it happened. Kelsey says she wants Brady, and they decide it's time to have sex. Okay, for the rest of the crappy crap in this book about possessiveness and the whole "omg you have to be married because you aren't trustworthy otherwise", I'm glad at least the consent is clear and strong and they both knew and vocalized that they wanted the sex to happen. I don't have to have that in every book, but considering how problematic this book has been until this point, I'm glad they really, for sure know what the other one wants at this point.
Okay. Enough of that. Back to the sexx.
Kelsey has some introspection on the sex they're about to have, but it's super boring and nothing we haven't heard before from either of these too, and then Brady gives her a sizzling kiss that includes tongue licking teeth (ew). The words "slow mating dance" is actually used but I'm not sure if it's about Brady as a whole or his tongue. So there's that visual.
Brady takes her dress off and then her underwear. Brady thinks about how gorgeous Kelsey is (yay headhopping). He thinks that he "had to make her his". Oh gag me. Just do her. Brady kisses her chesty woman bits (nipples, okay, and we have to apparently know they're coral colored).
Brady kisses downward to her navel (keep in mind they're still standing, he has to be doing some squats there. At least he'll have gotten his work out for the day). And oh joy oral sex. But only briefly, because then Brady lays her down on the cot and stretches over her. They do some more mouth to mouth. Then they do it.
Okay, it's more detailed than that. The word penetration is used. Also "more intimate union."
So in spite of her initial pain and how "big and hard" Brady is, it's omg perfectly wonderful!! And the rest is pretty standard sex scene fare. Not altogether stimulating (but then again, I don't like reading sex scenes).
Their spirits soared as he pressed into her as deeply as he could go, withdrew, then filled her again. And they were lost in the ecstasy, free-falling into pleasure unlike anything Kelsey had ever known.
I hear sex is great and all, but Kelsey obviously never knew the satisfaction of Nutella-dipped strawberries. Just sayin'.
Brady gets off of Kelsey after the deed is done and immediately starts whining. This time, he's upset because they had sex in the stable instead of, I don't know, a hot tub or a big bed or something. Kelsey immediately freaks out because, of course, he immediately found something to bitch about.
God, are these people ever happy?
Brady turned troubled eyes to hers. "here," he told her, not bothering to mask his guilt. "On a cot in the stable. In the midst of an argument. You are-were-a virgin, for heaven's sake. Not to mention, my wife. At the very least, it should have been in a real bed," he said thickly. "With candles and roses all around. Maybe even some champagne and strawberries or something."
Gag me. Dude, just be happy you got some instead of whining about how it wasn't perfect for someone who doesn't even give a crap. Kelsey, however, feels better that it wasn't her fault. She's also happy it was so spontaneous, because otherwise she would have "lost her nerve." Yup.
So Kelsey rolls on top of him and tries to put him at ease that she doesn't care and that it was an awesome ride. Brady tries to argue a bit more, but Kelsey interrupts him and explain she's chill with everything. Brady then rolls them over so he's on top. She thinks that if they have sex again, it'll be different, and that she'll fall all the way in love with him. She's not sure if she's "Ready" for that. Ugh. I mean, what the hell. Sex is complicated, sure, but can you people just make up your minds? I thought we were past this.
She's unsure, but Brady says he'll be more gentle. He doesn't realize her trepidation is from fear of being hurt emotionally, not physically. Instead of, you know, continuing the wonderful think they had going of EXPLAINING WHAT THE HELL THEY WANT OR ARE AFRAID OF, she tells Brady she doesn't want him to be gentle.
She didn't want him protecting her. She wanted to be his partner, his equal, in every way. But Brady, it seemed, had ideas of his own.
Then he's like 'WE'RE DOING THIS MY WAY' and instead of Kelsey speaking up, the chapter ends.
So they finally did it but they're still ridiculously annoying. Joy.
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